Supporting Your Teen throughout High School’s Challenges

**Collaborative post**

Many parents have attested to the challenges having a teen under your roof brings to the table. It’s not easy making the change from having a somewhat easy youngster who’s jolly most of the time to negotiate with a mostly moody teen who no longer laughs at your mom-jokes. But, what people regularly leave out of the conversation is the other side of the spectrum; the “why” to the dilemma. Teens don’t get out of bed in the morning every day and just decide to be difficult human beings – sure, they can sometimes be a little dramatic, but your teenage years can sometimes be some of the most challenging of your life. This is hard for parents to understand because from the outside, seeing as teens only have schoolwork to worry about. But, unfortunately, it goes much deeper than that. Peer pressure, vicious bullying, rejection, and insecurity caused by social media all come into play, creating the perfect storm that can feel impossible to overcome. That said, here are some tips on supporting your teen throughout their high school years and the challenges accompanied by them.

Stay present

When teens get especially hard to live under a roof, many parents tend to give them space to sort themselves out; this is understandable, seeing as teens tend to want to be left alone when going through something. But, giving your teen too much space can also make them feel isolated, which is the furthest thing from what they should feel when facing challenges. Staying present in your teen’s day-to-day life, asking them how they’re doing, what’s new in their life, and if they’re okay or need a hand, can make a massive difference in how they handle problems. Now, instead of them keeping something from you because they don’t know how to tell you, they’ll be comfortable enough to talk to you because they’re already used to being in constant communication with you.

Freedom is key

This may be the hardest pill to swallow for most parents, but giving your teen freedom is essential to them making the right choices when push comes to shove. Freedom doesn’t mean giving your teen your car keys and a free pass to stay out all night, but more in the lines of the freedom to make big decisions themselves, along with your guidance. For example, suppose they would instead switch to Sixth Form from their current school, or maybe even take other classes than those they have now. In that case, it might be worth giving them that call to make as well as the accountability thereof in order for them to make a decision and also deal with the consequences, good or bad, thereof themselves. Not only will there then be a mutual trust between the two of you, but respect as well. And, believe it or not, but your teen is less likely to betray your trust when you’ve given it to them compared to you putting a bubble around them and them defying you in a desperate attempt to feel a bit more in control of their own lives. 

Your teen is combatting multiple sources of stress, pressure, and expectations – considering making their journey a mutual one between the two of you. Not only will this bring you closer together, but you’ll be raising a responsible, mature adolescent in the process.