**Collaborative post**
As a mother to a young daughter I am very keen for her to grow up loving herself and that includes her body too.
I am very keen for Emmy to know that we all have lumps and bumps, imperfections and flaws. I bath with the children and shower with the door open, I am happy to walk around naked in front of them and will happily answer their questions. They have seen my C-Section scar, grazes and cuts I have and my unshaven legs – who has time for shaving them all the time?
Now Emmy is at an age where she is beginning to develop, changes are happening to her body and I don’t want anything to be taboo – I want to be an open an honest parent, one she can ask questions and that she knows will tell it as it is without sugar coating it.
I don’t believe that there should be taboo subjects, I’ve written about my miscarriages many times in a bid to help raise awareness, and Emmy does also know that Mummy had babies who are in heaven.
I have begun talking to her about some of the changes but thought it would be helpful to make a list of all the bodily changes which occur for girls all the way through to womanhood so we can look back on as she gets older, and so it may help others too.

Breasts and Puberty
The most noticeable changes which our girls will go through, of course all girls are different and there is no ‘normal’ age when these occur. Some will be much younger than others but as a general guide puberty generally starts sometime between 8 and 13 years of age.
The first evidence of puberty is generally breast development or the growth of pubic hair. As breasts start to grow, a girl will have small, firm, sometimes tender lumps (called breast buds) under her nipples. In some cases one breast will start to develop weeks or months before the other – this is perfectly normal and nothing to worry about; the breast tissue will get larger and become less firm over the next few years.
This will be followed 1 or 2 years later by a noticeable growth spurt. Her body will begin to build up fat,in certain areas such as breasts and around her hips and thighs. Arms, legs, hands, and feet will also get bigger.
Along with the noticeable physical changes which everyone can see they will also have menstruation to deal with.
Menstruation
Periods – As with other bodily changes, there is no set age for a girl to get these and it is important that you, as a parent sit them down and explain to them what will happen before it does, it can be scary for them but once they know it is normal and every girl gets them the slight of blood for the first time won’t leave them feeling scared.
A good sign they are getting close to starting their first period is vaginal discharge and can happen around 6 months before their first period.
Hormone changes
Hormones are an important part of puberty, and they can be the hardest of all changes for both the child and their parents.
Us adults can just about deal with our hormone changes monthly when we know what’s going on but imagine how hard it is for children who aren’t sure why this is happening. Their young bodies are loaded with hormones, which are essential as they are what instruct their bodies to do what they are doing monthly.
This stage can be a tough one for all involved – and sadly can’t be avoided.
Sweating
With all those hormones racing around it is no wonder your body will sweat more, and teenage sweat if far different to children’s sweat due to those raging hormones.
To combat it we need to teach proper cleaning habits daily. Bathing or showering everyday using mild soap and warm water. Wearing clean clothes each day deodorant or antiperspirant.
Bodily hair & Acne
Unwanted hair for girls isn’t the nicest thing but it happens and can appear on their arms, legs, pubic area, arm pits and even upper lips.
Acne often comes hand in hand with puberty.
Aging gracefully

Once completely passed puberty and out the otherside, us woman don’t escape from even more bodily changes, what was once called ‘growing up’ is now called ‘aging’.
Muscles become less flexible or tight, gravity takes hold and those once pert breasts need all the scaffolding possible to save them hitting our bellies. We may hate to think about it but the menopause is the next thing we need to think about and there are apps such as caria which can help you track your symptoms.
Hair that was once unwanted, now begins to thins, whiten or fall out and those monthly periods lessen through time eventually stopping completely due to the menopause bringing with it hot flashes, and mood swings as declining oestrogen levels affect other bodily functions.
Progesterone is a steroid hormone primarily produced by the ovaries in females, although the adrenal glands also synthesize smaller amounts. It plays a crucial role in the female reproductive system, particularly during the menstrual cycle and pregnancy. Hormone imbalances can often be caused by either too high or too low progesterone levels. These can cause fertility issues, menstrual irregularities, and menopausal symptoms. A progesterone test can help identify any imbalances quickly.
Loss of oestrogen affects vaginal elasticity, urinary continence, flexibility of blood vessels, and the tune-up of all female organs. Vaginal dryness is another unspoken bodily change which can often come hand in hand with menopause; these are all completely normal and part of life whether we like it or not.
I have said previously that I believe no subject should be taboo, which is why I have teamed up with Canesten to help raise awareness of just how common Vaginal dryness can be, and you really shouldn’t be embarrassed by it; in fact, it is experienced by as many as 1 in 3 women.

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Being a women is hard, but so rewarding as well. We give life! My mummy is going to have all this explaining to look forward too in the next couple of years. x Great tips of how to deal with it x
I agree tough but rewarding!
Hi Clare, I think it’s great that you’re posting about this. To be honest I think I tend to avoid talking about this sort of thing, but as you say, some of these changes happen to most women, or a large proportion, so it shouldn’t be taboo.
Thanks Rachel,
I think it can be hard to know how to start but once you do it gets easier
My daughter is going through puberty so I’m really glad I read this. I didn’t know about vaginal discharge 6 months before periods start – good to know!
I have to admit it wasn’t something I knew until I was researching on how to begin the talks with her
I think it’s a lovely thing to be open and honest about changes in our bodies and I hope I can be as open with my daughter as you have been with yours.
We all go through so many changes it is so important to talk about these things, which is why your post is so interesting!
Our bodies change so much, don’t they? So great that you are being open with your daughter and making her aware of what she can expect in the future
I’m so glad I had a parent who I could talk with about all of this, and it’s lovely that you’ve made it a priority to help your daughter feel comfortable discussing these things too!
Oh so many changes. You are clearly parenting well by being open with your daughter – such fab communication x
Every parent has their way of doing things and they know their child better than anyone else so you of course know what’s best. My mum was very open with me and I was able to ask her everything which was a fab help to me growing up.
Being female is such hard work, isn’t it. So many changes over our lives to have to deal with, and (often) unhelpful men not being supportive about it. Bah!
That’s good that you’re so open with your kids, at least your daughter should have an idea of what to expect and know not to be worried about her own body x
This is such a great post I love how it just gets to the point and doesn’t go along with the sugar coating so many would prefer! I often google questions related to all of these topics! I hope this taboo shifts ASAP so these topics can be openly discussed without awkwardness or judgment. We have enough to deal with already…(see all of above post)
It’s really great that you are being so honest with Emmy. I am the same with my girls and it is funny to see, but they now consider themselves a bit of an authority on growing up and tell me their friends come to them with questions! lol Mich x
Awww that’s lovely to hear
I absolutely love this post and thank you for writing about such an important topic.
My daughter is only 5 but she has seen what I am going through and knows my body is sensitive to hormones. If i could have avoided her noticing it would have been good but with the mood swings (crying for no reason) the pain and other symptoms such as “morning sickness without the pregnancy” she has seen the other side of it but knows she won’t end up with my conditions (glad its rare) Once she is older I will happily sit down and talk about the changes she will experience and encourage her to embrace them and to love herself
Thank you. It’s hard to hide these things from the kids isn’t it but also good for them to see it at the same time
I have an almost 13 year old, and I try to be as open and honest as I can. I am adamant she shouldn’t start shaving her legs too early though, I remember having terrible cuts from using my Dad’s real razor when I was about 11. I know they say it doesn’t cause it, but I am sure the hair grew in thicker once the baby fuzz had been shaved off! 😀
I often wonder the same with shaving