**Collaborative post**

Marriage isn’t just about romance and everlasting bliss. It’s also about learning to deal with joint finances, children and the humdrum minutiae that make up everyday life, yes they are boring and definitely not romantic but they are essential nonetheless.

My Wedding – March 9th 2007

I remember fondly having a conversation with one of my bosses on her wedding anniversary, we were chatting weddings as I had just gotten engaged – when I asked about hers her reply surprised me. She told me they had had a registry office wedding in jeans and t-shirts, with only a handful of guests and their kids and instead of a party after – they had gone car shopping (as you do). She said they were both happy no to get married however being married had more benefits for tax reasons so they just did!

Table of Contents

‘Love flies out through the window’

The old saying that when poverty comes in through the door, love flies out through the window,’ exemplifies the fact that if you do experience financial hardship during your marriage, you are more likely to argue. If you get your finances in order, you can then concentrate on the happier
aspects of your relationship. Don’t be reluctant to seek advice – if your household income comes to less than £26,000 per year you will be entitled to certain benefits. And you can also claim marriage tax allowance if you are on a lower income.

Be realistic and draw up a budget

One way in which a married couple can deal with any money problems is to work out a budget at the start of their married relationship. If you have an
accurate idea of the household income and expenditure, then you can allocate any surplus for treats or you can open a savings account.
Remember to be realistic, certain bills have to be paid on time, and you should always ensure that you have enough funds in your bank for your mortgage/rent, council tax, and utilities. You shouldn’t even dream of going on holiday if you can’t meet these basic expenses, the problems you’ll return to will only have become worse. A joint account might help you both deal with these household essentials. You can always agree that a certain sum can be transferred each month to your individual accounts.

Children can be expensive

If you are thinking of having children, then you should set aside a certain portion of your income each month to meet their needs. Toys, childcare costs, school uniforms and excursion costs all mount up. The Child Trust Fund closed in 2011, but the government suggests that parents take advantage of the Junior ISA scheme, in order to start a tax-free savings account for their children.

If your circumstances change for the worse

Should one or both of you lose your job, then go and seek advice immediately. You will still have to pay your bills despite this change in your
circumstances and the sooner you know what government money you may be entitled to, the sooner you can revise your budget and plan
accordingly. You’re less likely to argue if you act quickly, and you’ll feel more secure once you know that you can pay for your family’s essential expenses. Citizens Advice is a great place to start – I have had to visit many years ago when Paul suddenly became unemployed.

Divorce is always expensive

Although rarely thought about unless you happen to be rich or famous couples should make a prenuptial agreement which can be done via primelawyers just in case their relationship end in divorce. A staggering 40% of marriages do break up and one of the ways in which you can reduce your financial hardship is to sit down with a family lawyer and work out the best possible outcome for all parties should this unhappy event take place. Whenever Paul and I fight I always tell him he couldn’t afford a divorce!